Reviews by SJMJ91

Now, where do I start in this scathing review? First of all, I only wanted to watch this film to see if it was going to be equally as shit as New Moon even though I was expecting it to be. I didn't even watch the whole film (watched 85 minutes of it) and it was pretty much the same as New Moon! I mean, come on! The whole series has gone out of tone and lost what its trying to create but instead, the target audience get turned on by the actors in the film.


Kristen Stewart is an actress who starred in good films before the Twilight films and now she is an actress who is best known for such pathetic and corny films! I began to strongly dislike Bella in this one because she was like a slut who wanted both Jacob and Edward! I mean, Bella showed us again that nobody cares how she feels about the love triangle and the situation she's in let along what Jacob and Edward feel about it! Robert Pattinson as Edward was once again absolutely DREADFUL! I mean, I began to laugh at his awful acting in the opening scene of the film! The scene where Jacob and Edward confront each other while Bella is there is like the most idiotic, wasteful and cheesy confrontations and arguments I think I have ever seen. Despite, Robert Pattinson DID get a Razzie nomination for New Moon, I bloody hope he wins it this time because it would just be AMAZING if he did as well the film winning Worst Picture! Now, Taylor Lautner is as bad as Robert Pattinson and Edward! For one thing: he absolutely blinds the women who watch the films with his so-called 'six-pack' and his 'hot body' and they get turned on by the actor rather than the character. I mean, since when does a character or even an actor EVER turn on its target audience unless in a sex scene?! All these women screaming in films: 'Phwoar! He's fit!' or 'Mmmmm... I would' which I have heard before and it's a pain in the fucking arse! Not so much Stewart but Pattinson and Taylor, you just need to end your acting career like right now because it's not going to get any better!


To be honest, I did find the director selection quite good seeing as Slade has directed films of pure horror, terror and violence! Due to this, I wanted him to make it a more terrifying film rather than a stupidly soppy film like the previous ones but unfortunately, that didn't work. And now another annoying thing: they're being copycats towards Harry Potter by one book being split into two films so now I just can't wait for them to end! I mean, the series could've been really awesome but unfortunately its the actors and their fake bodies that have made the series a so-called 'success'.


Overall, all though Eclipse wasn't as painful as New Moon, it is still a very corny, laughably bad, stupid, pathetic, needlessly and unnecessarily overhyped film that will turn on more women! Go back and graduate at acting school, Rob and Taylor because you clearly didn't before these films!

After the extremely disappointing Shrek The Third, in all fairness I didn't even want to see another Shrek film. When the trailer of this film was released, it didn't really increase my anticipation so I thought I'd go and see the film anyway because its a Shrek film after all. So, I would say my expectations were quite low. However, when I watched it, I was pleasantly surprised at it. I mean, no the dialogue may not have been as powerful as the first two films but it became surprisingly emotional especially towards the end.


Shrek Forever After starts with Shrek and Fiona as parents to the three Ogre babies and Shrek just can't stand the fact that he can't have as much peace and quiet alone as he used to (like at the start of the film). When he and Fiona have an argument, Shrek is confronted by Rumpelstiltskin and Shrek is tricked into signing a contract to go back to his old ways. In this trick by Rumpelstiltskin, Shrek begins to realise what he has lost and what he needs in his life! Mike Myers proves once again that he has the perfect voice for the Shrek character, Eddie Murphy cracked me up again as Donkey and Cameron Diaz and Antonio Banderas did well too. I mean, as far as the characters in the fourth film compared to the other three, they look different or slightly act different but they are still the same heroes that we have seen in the others. As far as new villain is concerned Rumpelstiltskin, I thought he was a lame villain to be honest. I mean, yeah he looked scary but didn't seem to be as threatening as I would've expected.


The work from Chris Miller in the third film really needed to be replaced and no, Mike Mitchell didn't seem as much of a top-notch director like Andrew Adamson was for the first two films but it made up for the weak display in the third film. I mean, it turned out quite emotional and became very affectionate for adults so I am pleased that the series has ended satisfyingly.


Overall, Shrek Forever After is a satisfying end to the Shrek series that perhaps could've been better but could've been a lot worse. Enjoyable fun!

Ever since its released in late 2002/early 2003, this film has earned a lot of critical acclaim from film fans and critics all over the world! I was surprised when I noticed that City Of God reached the top 20 on IMDB's top 250 so I really needed to check this out! It has been called "the South American GoodFellas" and "the GoodFellas of the noughties". I mean, I can see why with the crime, deaths and drug deals but I feel that City Of God doesn't quite live up to GoodFellas. Besides GoodFellas, City Of God bought similarities to Slumdog Millionaire. To be honest, I think it is a good film for all people over the world to watch because it just goes to show that we should be grateful for what we've got because the people in City Of God have hardly got anything at all and people get killed a lot in Brazil. Then again, the same thing could be said about pretty much all African countries.


City Of God is set in the 60s and tells the story of two boys who have grown up together in a violent neighbourhood in Rio De Janiero who want to do two different things as part of their future career. One seeks to be a photographer and the other a drug dealer. Alexandre Rodrigues delivered a great performance as Buscapé (firecracker"). He is the main narrator and protagonist. A quiet, honest boy who dreams of becoming a photographer, and the only character who seems to keep from being dragged down into corruption and murder during the gang wars. Leandro Firmino Da Hora and Douglas Silva were awesome as Zé Pequeno aka Li'l Zé/Li'l Dice. He is an ultra-violent, psychopathic drug dealer who goes over dead bodies to fulfill his goals. He is deeply insecure with women. When his only friend Bené is struck by fate, it drives him over the edge.


Fernando Meirelles miraculously makes the film without any disturbance despite what happens within Brazil. He was once warned that because of the dangers that occur, the film would never be made. Because he decided to still go on with it despite the consequences, I really admire and respect him for that already after only watching this. City Of God earned four Academy Award nominations: Best Director (Fernando Meirelles), Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Film Editing and Best Cinematography but wasn't quite so lucky at the Golden Globes when it received a nomination for Best Foreign Language Film but didn't win.


City Of God is an extremely disturbing, psychological and violent thrill ride that tells people all over the world particularly those in richer countries that life could be worse. Plus, it goes to show that those who live in rough neighbourhoods can at least try to succeed in their lives. One of the most powerful films of the decade.

When I first saw this film which was a couple of years ago, I absolutely loved it but after revisiting it, I still really liked it a lot! It is a very entertaining film that is adventurous, quite funny and very intense especially during the escape attempts and when some of the prisoners become fugitives. There is one minor fault I have with this film was that I think it could have been about 20 minutes shorter.


The plot of The Great Escape isn't that complex at all. It is a very basic plot set in a German Prisoner Of War camp during World War II and tells the story of a mess escape from Stalag Luft III. Steve McQueen has delivered a great performance that was perhaps his most famous role. After the success of The Magnificent Seven, Steve McQueen has showed once again that he works amazingly with John Sturges but even more so this time! James Garner, Richard Attenborough, James Donald, Donald Pleasance deliver grand performances too.


Once again, John Sturges goes to create a masterpiece but surpasses his last success. I have to say that the music is the best thing about this film! It gives me chills and you can just hum to it. This has been referred by many as an action film but, to be honest, I wouldn't really call it an action film at all. It could be classed as a family film but perhaps its long duration didn't make the film fit into that genre. Despite that, I think it is suitable.


Overall, The Great Escape is an amazing film that I was gripped to almost all the way through it. Could've perhaps been shorter by about 20 minutes but apart from that, a masterpiece of the 60s!

Back in the 60s, many thought that The Magnificent Seven wasn't a very good idea because of how famous The Seven Samurai so expectations were very high for this film back then and still are now who love The Seven Samurai but haven't seen The Magnificent Seven. After its grand success, it has become one of the best remakes of all time and I have to agree with that! It may have been perhaps clearer and easier to understand than The Seven Samurai but did prefer that one.


Well, I don't really need to explain the plot of the film seeing as it's a remake. The cast in this film was another reason why The Magnificent Seven was a great success! Yul Brynner portrays Chris Adams who is a Cajun and is the leader of the seven gunmen to defend the village. They all wear black, smoke cigars and shoots sharp. Eli Wallach was awesome as Calvera who is the leader of the Mexican bandits. Steve McQueen, James Coburn, Charles Bronson, Robert Vaughn and others deliver great performances as well.


The Magnificent Seven has both its similarities and differences with The Seven Samurai. The most obvious one is that it set in a western background and lifestyle. Other differences are that the villagers in The Seven Samurai are sent to town to hire swordsmen whereas in the remake, the villagers are sent to town to buy guns, In Seven Samurai, the village is fortified to keep the bandits out until the climactic battle. In the remake, Chris states that the new walls were built to trap the bandits inside the village and a couple of others. The Seven Samurai director Akira Kurosawa sort of shocked me when he said he absolutely loved The Magnificent Seven. Now, THAT is saying something! Despite, The Magnificent Seven's critical success, it wasn't so successful regarding awards. The only nominated in earned at the Oscars in 1961 was for Best Original Score.


Overall, The Magnificent Seven is indeed a magnificent remake that has proved itself to be one of the best westerns as one of the best remakes of all time.

I was going into this film with high expectations because of how good people say it is and how awesome the Bridget Jones character is. However, when I watched it, I was greatly disappointed and found it perhaps one of the soppiest films that I have ever watched! I do seriously not understand why people find this so good and because of this, I find it very overrated. I was really bored almost through the whole film. I enjoyed like the first 15 minutes but after that, I just slowly lost my liking for it.


It tells the story of a young woman called Bridget Jones (Zellweger) in her early 30s, still single and worries about her weight. Her job is at a book publishing company in London where her main focus is fantasizing about her boss Daniel Cleaver (Hugh Grant). When she meets Mark Darcy (Firth) who is the barrister son of her parents' friends and a love triangle starts to begin for a fight for Bridget's heart. To be honest, I really don't see what was so amazing about Renée Zellweger's performance. She had what the character needs like body but think her acting could've been a lot better. Yes, I realise that she was nominated for an Oscar but I don't think she deserved it. Hugh Grant keeps appearing in romantic comedies and constantly playing the same kind of characters and, to be honest, I am getting a little tired of it. I'm not saying he's a bad actor but like Johnny Depp with weird films and weird characters: there's only a matter of time where people get tired of it and it just dies. Colin Firth, however, was good in this film.


Bridget Jones's Diary is one of the rare films that was directed by a woman. Sharon Maguire has only been known for this film but nothing else. The film was based on the book by a close friend of hers and one of the main characters – Shazzer – is in fact based on Maguire.


Overall, Bridget Jones's Diary is a very disappointing, boring and soppy film that I think could've been a lot better all around.

Another soppy (not bad) Hugh Grant rom-com was the first thing that came to my mind when I heard of his film and saw a couple of pictures and the poster and this is exactly what I thought of it. It was an enjoyable film that was inspiring, funny and emotional. I don't really know why but it reminded me of Billy Elliot. Also, I have to say that About A Boy is a very predictable film with consequences you sort of knew was going to happen.


About A Boy tells us the story of a young man called Will Freeman (Grant) who lives a happy lifestyle thanks to a successful Christmas song that his father wrote and because of this, Will doesn't need to work. He spends most of his free time smoking, watching television and reading about pop culture. One day, Will meets young boy Marcus (Hoult) who is going hard phases in life and together they create a friendship like father and son who begin to understand each other. After bringing us British romantic comedies like Four Weddings And A Funeral and Notting Hill, there was something that I guaranteed that Grant was either going to fail with About A Boy or once again succeed. Hugh Grant is the one British actor who fits perfectly in romantic comedies! His characters are very similar because they're just idiots and the ways with the women are very similar too. Nicholas Hoult delivers a great performance as Marcus! He did remind me a lot of Jamie Bell in Billy Elliot.


Brothers Chris and Paul Weitz worked well on this film and they have been directors who usually work separately. Chris has bought us American Pie, The Golden Compass and regrettably New Moon. Paul bought In Good Company, American Dreamz, Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant and the upcoming Little Fockers.


Overall, About A Boy is an enjoyable romantic comedy that will delight all hearts! Another successful Hugh Grant rom-com!

After the huge success of Creature Comforts and Wallace And Gromit, expectations of Chicken Run were exceedingly high! Chicken Run is almost like an animated version of the classic film The Great Escape with the same music and very similar dialogue! I have to say that Chicken Run is one of the smartest and most extraordinary animated films that I think have ever been made! It is a very British film with really fantastic British humour and modern Britain background.


Chicken Run is set in a countryside chicken farm in Yorkshire, England in 1959. Ginger is the leader of the entire farm of chickens who are under the dominion of an idiotic farmer and his psychotic, greedy and evil wife. The chickens fall victims to the couple to make money by at first selling eggs (like workers) but then selling chicken pies. Many times, they have all tried to escape the farm and earn their freedom but when they meet Rhode Island Red rooster Rocky and catch him flying over the farm, their hopes begin to rise and make an epic escape from the farm. Mel Gibson voices Rocky and his acting was fabulous! To be honest, I thought that Rocky was a typical Mel Gibson character with not a heroic and leading nature but a charming nature like ladies man so to speak. Well, a "chick's man". Julie Sawalha's performance was very good as Ginger. The rest of the cast did well such as Miranda Richardson, Benjamin Whitrow, Timothy Spall, Phil Daniels, Jane Horrocks and Imelda Staunton.


Nick Park and Peter Lord create another masterpiece! What I admire about their work towards this film is that they bring something new to the screen but there are a lot of key points of originality like the Great Escape music, the clever jokes that we say nowadays and amazing characters! Aardman and Nick Park go onto create the Wallace And Gromit feature film after Chicken Run and now after seeing and loving both of them, I want to see something else from them but this time, something a tad bit different.


Overall, Chicken Run is a really smart, hilarious and quite emotional film that is one that I loved as a child and still love now! It is another fantastic demonstration at what we Brits can do. Definitely one of my all-time favourite animated family films!

Despite the fact I had almost no knowledge of the video games that this film is based on, I really wanted to see it! I mean, the games look amazing but the film looks an amazing piece of entertainment and guess what? It was! To be perfectly honest, those who haven't ever played the game, the game doesn't need to be played to see the film because the plot itself is very basic and it resembled other films that I have seen in the past. I think the film that Prince Of Persia: The Sands Of Time reminded me a lot of was The Lion King which did really surprise me. I like to call it the Disney Indiana Jones that I feel is combined with The Golden Compass, Pirates Of The Caribbean and The Chronicles Of Narnia.


Set in the Persian Empire during the 6th century, Prince Dastan is a street urchin who is adopted by the king as his heir so the king's two sons wouldn't fight over the throne. When the king is murdered and Dastan is accused, he flees but then comes back and teams up with Princess Tamina to stop his uncle Nizam from taking an ancient dagger known as "The Dagger Of Time" which could destroy the world. To be honest, I did think that Jake Gyllenhaal would be a cheesy actor to play Prince Dastan but he delivers a performance that I was surprisingly impressed by! In fact, because he played the part so well, he was probably the best choice for the role. After Quantum Of Solace, Gemma Arterton proves once again that she is one shit actress! I mean, yeah there were a lot of jokes involved in the film and a lot of romance between Princess Tamina and Prince Dastan but she didn't make the Princess very interesting. She was like an absolutely helpless idiot that was just chasing after him! Ben Kingsley and Alfred Molina deliver good performances too.


Mike Newell already made a name for himself after directing Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire and I have to say that Prince Of Persia: The Sands Of Time is another fantastic creation of his! He is a director of dark, intense visual entertainment that will try to make his films for adults as well as kids no matter the plot. The comedy involved was quite cheesy at times but it did make me chuckle. It was that kind of humour where you'd laugh and you'd think "What the hell?" and carry on laughing. I am glad that Disney made something like this because it has its exciting moments, sad moments and magical moments which is something that appears in almost every Disney film. Also, it is like The Lion King and that is one of the ultimates from Disney so I couldn't see them not doing it.


Overall, Prince Of Persia: The Sands Of Time is an absolutely brilliant entertaining film that I would call a visual masterpiece like Alice In Wonderland but not one of the best films of the year. I wouldn't only call it as the Indy 4 of 2010 but also the Indiana Jones of Disney. I would like to see a trilogy based on the games seeing as the first was awesome! It was surprisingly like The Lion King so if you love that film (which is pretty much everybody), you'd be entertained by Prince Of Persia.

This is now the 12th film adaptation on the heroic high-skilled archer and swordsman known as Robin Hood. Because of the large amount of films made based on him would have made an effect on critics and fans expectations and overall opinions of the 2010 version. I guaranteed that Robin Hood was going to be either as amazing as Gladiator, as good as King Arthur or as shit as Kingdom Of Heaven but it turned out better than King Arthur but nowhere near as good as Gladiator! I think the main flaws were that it did not really feel like a Robin Hood story and it was incredibly slow. It wasn't very epic either like the trailer demonstrated.


Robin Hood is set in late 12th Century England. Robin Longstride is a common archer in the Third Crusade. Following the death of Richard the Lionheart in battle, Robin and three other common soldiers (aka Merry Men) attempt to return to their homeland, having spent ten years fighting abroad. Along the way they come across an ambush of the King's guard by Sir Godfrey, an English Knight with French lineage and allegiance. When King Richard dies, his younger brother John is crowned king. Russell Crowe collaborates for a fifth time with Ridley Scott as Robin. After seeing a couple of still pictures and trailers, I was thinking that there might be a second Maximus on our hands or "Maximus back from the dead" so to speak. It was a good thing that they were different but seeing Crowe as the heroic Robin as a leader during a battle, it bought back old memories of Maximus in Gladiator. Sienna Miller was originally playing Lady Marion but Cate Blanchett took over. To be honest, I am glad that she took over because Marion is the love interest of Robin and it would look better seeing as she is almost the same age as Russell Crowe. Mark Strong is becoming a real Hollywood star as of late starring in a lot of fantastic films such as Stardust, Sherlock Holmes and Kick-Ass. Robin Hood is another fantastic film with him in and now I am beginning to see him as a villain. If he ever plays a heroic character, I would find it quite lame seeing as he is more of the villain type.


Ridley Scott crafts together his third historic epic. His first one was a giant success (Gladiator) and the next one was a real disappointment (Kingdom Of Heaven) but Robin Hood, on the other hand, was a success but doesn't quite live up to Gladiator. This time, 10 years ago, Gladiator was released and Ridley Scott tries to make Robin Hood like "the Gladiator of the 2010s" with obviously a historic plot but with similar production settings, music and costumes. Most of the filming was in Wales for the action scenes but the castles and fields were mostly in Surrey. I think this would've really failed if it was directed by a non-English director or if it wasn't filmed in the UK. Great that it was filmed in Wales as well as England. The script had to be rewritten seeing as Ridley Scott didn't approve of it and that delayed filming even further. I did think the script was pretty good. Quite soppy in some moments but apart from that, awesome!


Overall, Robin Hood is a fairly decent Ridley Scott-Russell Crowe collaboration but did have its disappointments. It is more like King Arthur. Both of them can do so much better!